Tag: Giving

Not Everything that Counts…

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We can measure dollars and cents. Things with a numerical value that add up, subtract, divide and multiply (you know how math works). This is the easiest stuff to measure. We can count it. But does it really count? Does it really matter?

Often the most important things in life cannot be counted or measured. For example, we can’t measure the psychological impact on a mother who has started her own business, is now able to provide an income for her family ensuring her kids can go to school and is paying the loan back which got her started. I can tell you that we know that she is a different person now as she lifts her family out of poverty. We know she is having a positive impact. We just don’t know how to fully measure it. There is no graph that can measure every good thing that happens now, from the daily difference in their family interactions to the long-term impact her children will have in the world now they are getting an education. Measuring loan size and repayment rate just doesn’t seem to do it justice.

Even so, now, she is a better mum, a better business owner, a better member of the community and a better global citizen. She makes our world a better place because someone donated some dollars and cents, and the outcome is worth far more than the initial amount of money.

Raise Kind Billionaires

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Before they were world famous, super wealthy, world shaping icons, the world’s richest people were babies, and toddlers, and teenagers. They were shaped by the people closest to them, values were instilled, and beliefs were modelled. How they turned out was heavily influenced by their upbringing.

For example, Bill Gates was always going to give away all his money because that is what he learned from his mother. Whether he became a billionaire or not, generosity was one of his values. Thank God for his mother’s influence (…and maybe his fathers? I don’t know much about that).

You see that small child in front of you, the one in your house that you love so deeply and drives you completely mad that it hurts your head? Or the kid next door? They could be one of the next billionaires in our world. Most likely they will make more money that you. Instil in them the value of generosity now so that it stays with them their whole life, and if they happen to be the richest person in the world they can change it for the better through their giving. Even if they don’t become the richest person in the world, they can still make it a better place through generosity.

Giving in Australia is going up and down. Less people are giving but the ones that are giving, are giving more.

You can shape that culture and it starts with your kids. Teach them about generosity and in doing so, it will make them a kinder person and our world a little bit better.

There is no competition

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Ryan Holiday, an author, says that “Authors are not in competition with each other. They are in competition with people not reading.”

He is not busy trying to promote his books at the cost of other authors and their books, bad-mouthing them and discouraging people from buying them. In fact, he owns a bookstore and actively promotes other authors and their work.

In his mind, the more people who read, the better, regardless of the book. I whole heartedly agree.

In the same way, charities are not in competition with other charities. They are in competition with people not giving. So, I don’t try to promote Opportunity International Australia at the cost of other charities, bad-mouthing them and discouraging people from giving to them. There have been times when I’ve notice that Opportunity is not a fit for a particular supporter – their passion does not align with the work that Opportunity does, and I have suggested other organisations they can give to. I also encourage people have a portfolio of organisations that they support through their giving so that their impact can be spread across a few different areas because we are more than just ‘single-issue’ people.

In my mind, the more people who give to charity, the better, regardless of the organisation. I hope you whole heartedly agree.

With, or without, her spoon, she is right

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My favourite part about watching my son run around the track at his athletics club is that it’s not important who crosses the finish line first. The focus is on getting the best out of yourself and going for a Personal Best (PB) time. I love seeing him run faster, throw, and jump further than he has ever run before. He is excited by that as well as he discovers that he is capable of so much more than he thought possible.

Sometimes he wins, sometimes he doesn’t, but it doesn’t matter, he is only competing against himself. The strength of that attitude is that it leaves space for more than one person to win in any race. It is not a zero-sum game, but it’s a place of growth, a place of development, a place of abundance.

We might think that type of attitude has no place outside of kids’ athletics, but it is truly how we can live our whole lives.

In a world where we live with the philosophy of “survival of the fittest” (which is a sham by the way), we are taking the easy way out. It’s easy when all you have to do is try and just be a little bit better than the other team, the other person, the other organisation, we do improve but only incrementally.

If we shifted our focus from trying to be a little bit better than someone else, and begin to imagine what we are capable of, then we realise that we can always get better compared to what we have done before and we are capable of so much more than we think is possible.

Mostly, just because someone else is doing well, it doesn’t mean that we lose out. There isn’t a limited amount of success in the world, there is an abundance meaning we can celebrate when other people are doing well and strive to get our own PB.

As Reese Witherspoon said, “Someone else’s success isn’t impeding mine”.

I Didn’t Win Again?

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There’s the old story of a man sitting in front of the tv watching the lotto numbers be read out and exclaiming, ‘Dammit, I didn’t win again!’

The response then comes from his partner, ‘I keep telling you Albert, you have to buy a ticket first!’

The arrogance of someone expecting to win something that they haven’t even entered is funny for the onlooker and sad for those involved.

But at some level we all do that. We can all expect an outcome without putting in the work beforehand. Expecting to get a promotion without putting in the hard work previously. Expecting to lose weight without eating well and exercising. Expecting to win an event without training. Expecting that the world will come calling without spending the time creating and preparing. Expecting to win the respect of others without first showing respect to people.

First, we do the work, then the outcomes happen. Not all outcomes are guaranteed though, but if the work is done first then the likelihood of an expected outcome is much higher.

One outcome that is guaranteed is the outcome of generosity. Once you are generous you feel good, you help the world be a better place and create good things all around you. You don’t even need to buy a ticket, just give some money away.

No matter where you go, there you are…

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If you are worrying about money now, thinking that if you can just get through the next few months and everything will be fine, you are wrong.

If you worry today, you will worry tomorrow.

If you put things off today, you will put things off tomorrow.

If you are stingy today, you will be stingy tomorrow.

If you are generous today, you will be generous tomorrow.

It’s not about your circumstances, it’s about how you are responding to them and it’s about who you are when you respond.

Hoping that your circumstances will change tomorrow won’t help you feel better, or more relaxed, or more organised, or more generous today.

Change always starts today, right now.

So, become the type of person who doesn’t get anxious about finances, or who is not worried by the challenges we face in life, or who is organised or who is generous.

How? That’s the funny thing; I think you already know the answer to that.

Usually, the starting point is the answer to this question – what are you avoiding?

It doesn’t matter where you go in life, or what circumstances you find yourself in, ‘you’ will always be there. Become the type of ‘you’ that you want.

Generous Robot

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I jumped on the bandwagon and asked ChatGPT to write a short article on generosity for me. This is what it came up with…(I’ve made some notes along the way).

“Generosity is the act of giving freely and without expecting anything in return. (Solid start…)

It is a quality that has been admired and celebrated throughout human history, and is considered a virtue in many cultures and religions. (A little broad and sweeping but a fair comment).

Being generous can take many forms, from giving money or goods to those in need, to volunteering time and expertise to help others. (Very nice. Much of what I have written is about these elements of generosity).

It can also be as simple as being kind and attentive to those around us, or offering a listening ear to someone who needs it. (Yep. Accurate).

One of the benefits of being generous is that it can bring joy and satisfaction to both the giver and the receiver. (Yes, that’s exactly what I have said before).

Giving to others can make us feel good about ourselves and can create a sense of purpose and fulfillment. It also helps to build stronger communities, as acts of generosity can foster trust and connection between people. (This is scarily on point, the communities thing was a nice touch too).

In today’s fast-paced and often-self-centered world, generosity can be a powerful force for good. It reminds us that we are all interconnected and that our actions can have a positive impact on the lives of others. (Okay, now we are delving into a poignant comment on our current cultural challenges. Preach it robot!).

Generosity is not only about giving material things, but also about giving our time, energy, and attention to others. It’s about being present and fully engaged with the people around us, and about being willing to put the needs of others before our own. (Nice little wrap up, a little bit primary schoolish for me)

So, let’s strive to be more generous in our daily lives. Small acts of kindness can make a big difference in the world, and can bring a sense of joy and purpose to our own lives. (Lands it with a call to action! Am I out of a job?).”

I tell you, if a robot gets it, surely we can all embrace a little more generosity in our lives.

Happiness Comes

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“You need to give him some space.” I don’t know how many times I have said that to my kids over the last couple of years. They love our dog so much. Too much sometimes. They smother him with their affection and occasionally it will get too much for him and he will stand up and move away. He never gets upset with them, but in his patient, caring way, he communicates that he has had enough of their love and requires some space.

The kids don’t really understand and get upset about it, to which I reply, “Just wait. He will come back when he is ready, and when you have settled down a bit. But the more you chase him the more he will avoid you”.

It got me thinking about happiness and a quote from Viktor Frankl:

“Happiness cannot be pursued. It must ensue. One must have a reason to be happy”.

What I think he is saying is that happiness is not the goal of life. The pursuit of happiness is folly. If we pursue meaning, that will bring about happiness. Happiness will come after we find our meaning.

Meaning, for most of us, is usually based around the people in our life. Our families, friends, people we serve in our career, or in the community. If we can find it, then happy moments will appear, even if there are challenges and difficulties.

The more we chase after happiness, the more it will avoid us. Once we find our meaning, and have settled down a bit, happiness will come to us.

2023 Theme – With Intent

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Usually ‘with intent’ has a negative connotation. For example, ‘with intent to distribute’…(or any of the below…)

It means that there is a purpose behind specific actions that someone takes, and that individual is aware that their actions will most likely cause a certain outcome, making them responsible for that outcome.

What it brings to mind for me is how my 6-year-old son behaves in a way that shows intent to annoy his 3 year old sister. I will often share my disappointment when he upsets her on purpose just to get her to react.

But it works both ways, because intent can be positive, and that is my hope for 2023. To be intentional with my actions – the more specific the better, in areas where my life isn’t going how I would like.

What makes intent positive or negative are the words that come after ‘with intent’. ‘With intent’, to what?  

So, my theme for 2023 is to live ‘with intent’. Intent to:

  • Be generous with specific amounts, organisations and people
  • Learn specific things
  • Improve specific parts of my finances
  • Spend time doing specific things which strengthen my body and mind
  • Spend time with specific people (and to find some more of these specific people)

(I do have these specific things, organisations and people articulated, in case you were wondering. This is just an overview.)

2023 is going to be my year of intent, to live knowing that my actions will most likely cause a certain outcome and that I am responsible for that outcome.

Where could you use some positive intent?

Two Generosity Tips for Christmas

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I’ve been trying to get things tidy before Christmas comes, to get everything sorted before the end of the year.

Isn’t that often the experience that many of us have at this time of year, during the build up towards Christmas?

Too many things to do, not enough time.

So here are my two generosity tips to help you survive at this time of year:

Firstly, go easy on yourself, be generous to yourself.

“Perfect is the enemy of good”, we know that saying but I also think perfect is the enemy of joy.

Christmas doesn’t have to be perfect, the build-up doesn’t have to be perfect.

Find time to spend quality time with your friends and with your family and find time for joy. Perfect doesn’t necessarily always fit with Christmas.

Secondly, let people give you stuff. If they want to, let people give you presents.

We find joy when we give so maybe try not to avoid it, allow it to happen and let people express their generosity and gratitude towards you.

It’s a gift to them.

So go easy on yourself, be generous to yourself and let people give you presents, be generous to them at the same time.

And so from everyone at the Generosity Guy, which is me…

Merry Christmas!