Tag: Money

You are an extra

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

You are an extra in someone else’s movie

Sure, you are the main character in yours but for the majority of the world, you don’t even have a name or a plot line. Maybe you are ‘guy/girl who walks across the screen’, but that’s about it.

It’s important to keep that in mind because it can be so easy to get caught up in our own narrative and think that my story or experience is the only one that matters, and everyone else is playing a supporting role for my benefit. Which is a dangerous place to operate from because getting so wrapped up in ‘me’ and ‘my world’ pushes everyone else and their needs the periphery.

“Why should that matter?” I hear you ask…well, it’s simple. If everyone in the world was all about ‘want’ and ‘take’, we would consume everyone and everything in our paths. But people have value, and how we treat those around us creates the culture for the world we live in. Also, selfishness is not good for us. That goes for individuals, teams, companies, countries and the world.

What is good for us is generosity. Giving to other people, be that time, energy, love, money – whatever you have to offer, will benefit them but also you. Giving is good for you.

So, you are an extra in someone else’s movie. You are not the centre of the universe. It might sound depressing but the good news is that you can be the best extra in someone else’s movie today. Just by being kind, friendly and smiling at someone else, you can create an amazing scene which will impact how the rest of their story plays out.

First: Action

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

It is perhaps the most challenging part of being an adult – realising that most good things in life come after action. Be that motivation, inspiration, momentum, direction, creative juices, freshly baked cookies…you name it.

On the flipside, there are very few desirable things that come from inaction.

It’s the same for the feeling of fulfilment and joy that come after a generous act. We know that the brain and the body respond in positive ways when we are generous to others. We like the feeling of our brain and body responding like that. But we don’t always do the thing that brings about that feeling.

It first requires action. It needs proactive behaviour that chooses to be generous first, then experience the good things follow.

To find the good things in life, you must act first. To find that good feeling and the positive outcomes of generosity, you first must be generous. The beauty is that it can start with your thoughts. You can even think generously about someone and start to receive some of the benefits. But don’t leave it there. It’s not a real act until you act it out.

Giving is better

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

Giving is better than receiving. It’s a cliché for a reason – it is so widely used because it is true. Which is amazing because I love receiving. How good is it to get a thoughtful gift? Receiving something new creates an amazing physiological response in our body, excitement, joy and happiness. It changes our mood.

Giving away a thoughtful gift also has an amazing physiological response in our body. It creates joy and a sense of fulfilment at the sight of someone we care about getting excited, feeling joy and being happy. The difference is that the feeling you get when you give something thoughtful to someone else, lasts longer than their feelings of excitement, joy and happiness at receiving the gift.

It’s feels counterintuitive but a new toy loses its shine super quick (be that an actual toy or a new iPhone), but the feeling of joy the giver has, lasts a lot longer. There is a great sense of fulfilment that comes when you realise that you are the type of person who is generous.

“I act generously” – is a great statement to say about yourself.

It’s sounds much better than “I love getting gifts from people”.

Giving is better than receiving.

Thank You

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

“Did you know that you have impacted 44,000 people since you first started giving nearly 20 years ago?”

You could see the tears well up in their eyes as the enormity of their true impact started to sink in. They were a humble couple, faithfully giving what they could to the work of Opportunity International Australia. Some years they would give large amounts, other years smaller amounts, but they were always thinking about being generous with what they had been given. You would walk by them in the street and have no idea that these people had changed the lives of so many.

Through their giving, they had provided small loans to thousands of families across Asia so that they could start a business, create an income, put food on the table, send their kids to school and pay the loan back. Through the process of repayment and recycling their impact grew and grew – like an investment in the improvement of our world, it will continue.

Today, my job was to share with them the true depth of the difference they have made and to say “Thank you”. I love my job.

You cannot be happy and stingy

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

Famous basketball coach, John Wooden, said when we give away three of the things we want most, ‘happiness, freedom, and peace of mind’, that’s when we actually receive them. Which is the great, mystical law of generosity – it is by giving generously to others that we receive an abundance. Often we get more than we give.

So, instead of being fearful of running out and experiencing a lack, which stifles generosity, we can be assured that there is enough to go around, with leftovers. Enough happiness. Enough freedom. Enough peace of mind. Enough money. Enough food.

At this point, you might (rightfully so) have some questions. If there is enough of these things, plus leftovers, why do we currently experience a lack of some, maybe all, of them in the world today?

This lack exists because people hold on too tightly to what they have. Because generosity is missing, which creates people who are unhappy, trapped and anxious. Wealthy, but anxious.

So be generous. Give away happiness, freedom, and peace of mind to others. It will serve them and you.

How do you give happiness, freedom, and peace of mind away? That’s the question that only you can answer. (But it probably starts with giving some money).

The Best and The Worst

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

It is commonly thought that an emergency situation brings out the best and the worst in people.

The worst seems to be obvious, when people take advantage or abuse someone who has lost everything. Examples of this include people looting homes after a fire or a flood has caused damage and evacuations. Or those who seek government assistance available to people who suffered loss, even though they didn’t suffer loss. They try to cheat the system, taking resources away from people who actually need it. Taking advantage of others fits into ‘the worst of people’.

So, on the other hand, the ‘best’ is when we see people coming together, being generous, supporting each other, taking care of those who have lost something or someone. Examples of this include when a community brings spare clothes, bedding and other necessities to help those who have lost everything, giving space in their homes, giving money to help, helping rebuild. We have seen this time and time again in Australia when fires or floods have torn people and places apart. It is one of the most inspirational things to see. It also happens far more than the ‘worst’ examples. Helping others fits into ‘the best of people’.

So, why wait for an emergency to take place to be the ‘best’. We can do this every day through our actions and words to those around us. We all know what the best is, let’s remember to do it.

The Only Donations that Count

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

We have spider webs in our garage. It’s starting to get to the point that I dodge around them to get to my car. Outside of that, they aren’t hurting anyone as that section of the garage is for the Christmas decorations which we won’t need for a couple of months.

Except for the fact that my feelings about spiders and their webs are very much in the negative sphere. Every time I see them, I think “This weekend, I am going to destroy those webs”, then I get into the car and drive off, or I walk into the house and completely forget that they exist until I enter the garage again and go through the exact same process. My inaction slowly makes things worse as the webs get bigger and more intense.

I have strong feelings about them, but nothing will change until I act on those feelings. Once I do that I know that I will feel better and it will create a better experience for everyone involved (except the spiders but I don’t care as much about them).

Donating to a charity can be like that. We can have the best intentions to give some money to make a difference in the world. We can have strong feelings about a situation and even share those feelings with other people, but until we act on those feelings and give some money away nothing will change. In fact, we probably make the world a little bit worse through our inaction as the problems slowly get bigger and more intense.

It can be challenging to find the ‘right’ organisation to give to. It can be overwhelming at the thought of sifting through many organisations to try and figure out what they all do. We all want to make wise decisions when donating money but as Oliver Burkeman put it, “The only donations that count are the ones you actually get around to making.”

Talking is nice, but giving is better.

It Looks Beautiful, But It’s Dead

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

You probably know it as the place where the human body floats, but nothing can survive in it, which is why they call it what they do. Yep, the Dead Sea has neither fish nor vegetation. It is a ‘wasteland’ of water because it has too much salt, meaning that people float in it.

Compare it to the Sea of Galilee, just to the north, which is full of abundance. It is teeming with fish and rich, colourful plant life, which is weird because both bodies of water come from the same source, the River Jordan.

So, why the difference between the two?

It turns out that the Dead Sea is dead because it is stingy, and the Sea of Galilee is full of life because it is generous.

Generous because the Sea of Galilee takes in water from the River Jordan, and then it flows out. The constant movement of receiving and then giving brings abundant life to it and everything thrives.

The Dead Sea does not do that. It has no outlet for water to be distributed. It just takes in water, and the only way water disappears is through evaporation leaving the salt behind, which is toxic to fish and plants, making it a people-floating place of non-life. Mind you, it looks beautiful but it’s dead.

We are like bodies of water (heck, aren’t we made up mostly of water?). If we continue to take in more and more in life without a way to pass it on and be generous, we become toxic, and life disappears. (It may look beautiful but it’s dead.)

To bring life and colour and fullness, when we receive what is available to us (be that money, love, respect or knowledge) we must find as many outlets as possible to give it away again.

Life is about giving. The more you give, the more life it brings, to you and the people you give to.

Generosity Porn

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

“Who is filming that?”

It’s a question I often ask myself as I’m watching videos online. You know the ones, filmed so that you feel like a bystander watching as if this is normal life, and then something funny or embarrassing or heartfelt or outrageous happens. But I find myself thinking, why was someone filming at that exact moment? Did they just happen to be recording a video and accidentally catch something that turned out to be internet-worthy?

The number of times I have tried and failed to video my kids doing something funny/adorable in everyday life, tells me people must be either recording every moment of their life to accidentally catch something amazing…or, it is set up. Which, of course, most video content on the internet is.

You may be familiar with recent story about the women receiving flowers as a random act of kindness, which was filmed without her consent and became a viral TikTok video. Or the guy who was just trying to go to Coles for some food and became famous because someone sneakily paid for his groceries.

It’s been a trend for a while now, where a benevolent individual is generous to the unknowing and ‘sad’ public, so they can experience a glimpse of hope in their otherwise ‘depressing’ lives, all whilst being secretly filmed. The ‘joy’ that it brings is multiplied by the millions of views the video gets and we can all feel a little bit better about the good in the world, as the creator earns something from their kind act, be that money, followers, fame etc.

It begs the question, if an act of generosity isn’t filmed and posted, did it even happen?

But generosity is generosity, right? What does it matter that millions of people have consumed it?

Yeah, I’m not sure where I land on this. Is it okay or not?

Here’s why it could be okay:

  • It’s just a video of a young guy giving someone flowers, or a dude paying for someone’s food
  • It promotes generosity
  • Random acts of kindness are awesome
  • We should make generous people famous for what they do. Bad news travels fast, good news usually doesn’t – lets celebrate it when it does.

Here is why it is not okay:

  • Clearly, these videos are not about the recipient of the gift at all. Part of generosity is giving something that is helpful to the recipient, not an act that dehumanises them in the process as the video becomes viral distorts the real story of the individual
  • It reduces the recipient to a product that is consumed. That is not dignifying. Generosity builds people up, empowers them and provides dignity.
  • Like actual pornography, it’s a cheap knock off of the real thing, created only for the end viewer/customer at the cost of those involved.

In any act of generosity, the giver will always get something out of it, that is part of the beauty of it. But when it ends up that the giver gets more out of it than the person on the receiving end, be that likes, follows, views, attention, fame, or money, then it ceases to be a generous act and becomes manipulation for profit.

So, the safest way to be generous is to do in intentionally, thoughtfully and as often as you can, without uploading it to the internet.

Thief

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

Don’t compare yourself to other people. You never know who is taking steroids. You never know who is drowning in debt. You never know who is a liar. – Ryan Holiday

Who are you in competition with? Why? Do they even know?

For me is it other fundraisers, other staff, other parents from my kids’ school, other people on the internet?

I wonder if they walk around thinking, “I am winning!” or are they so focussed on doing the best they can that they don’t even notice or care about me.

In a zero-sum game world, someone else winning would mean that I am losing. But what if we are not in competition with everyone else? What if we are all on the same team and we are only in competition with who we used to be?

If comparison with other people is the thief of joy, then personal progress is the thief of comparison.

This is my journey. This is my race. Success is whatever I want it to be. Survival of the fittest is a sham. We don’t live in a zero-sum game world. When you grow and progress then so do I.