Tag: Money

Not Everything that Counts…

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We can measure dollars and cents. Things with a numerical value that add up, subtract, divide and multiply (you know how math works). This is the easiest stuff to measure. We can count it. But does it really count? Does it really matter?

Often the most important things in life cannot be counted or measured. For example, we can’t measure the psychological impact on a mother who has started her own business, is now able to provide an income for her family ensuring her kids can go to school and is paying the loan back which got her started. I can tell you that we know that she is a different person now as she lifts her family out of poverty. We know she is having a positive impact. We just don’t know how to fully measure it. There is no graph that can measure every good thing that happens now, from the daily difference in their family interactions to the long-term impact her children will have in the world now they are getting an education. Measuring loan size and repayment rate just doesn’t seem to do it justice.

Even so, now, she is a better mum, a better business owner, a better member of the community and a better global citizen. She makes our world a better place because someone donated some dollars and cents, and the outcome is worth far more than the initial amount of money.

Raise Kind Billionaires

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Before they were world famous, super wealthy, world shaping icons, the world’s richest people were babies, and toddlers, and teenagers. They were shaped by the people closest to them, values were instilled, and beliefs were modelled. How they turned out was heavily influenced by their upbringing.

For example, Bill Gates was always going to give away all his money because that is what he learned from his mother. Whether he became a billionaire or not, generosity was one of his values. Thank God for his mother’s influence (…and maybe his fathers? I don’t know much about that).

You see that small child in front of you, the one in your house that you love so deeply and drives you completely mad that it hurts your head? Or the kid next door? They could be one of the next billionaires in our world. Most likely they will make more money that you. Instil in them the value of generosity now so that it stays with them their whole life, and if they happen to be the richest person in the world they can change it for the better through their giving. Even if they don’t become the richest person in the world, they can still make it a better place through generosity.

Giving in Australia is going up and down. Less people are giving but the ones that are giving, are giving more.

You can shape that culture and it starts with your kids. Teach them about generosity and in doing so, it will make them a kinder person and our world a little bit better.

There is no competition

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Ryan Holiday, an author, says that “Authors are not in competition with each other. They are in competition with people not reading.”

He is not busy trying to promote his books at the cost of other authors and their books, bad-mouthing them and discouraging people from buying them. In fact, he owns a bookstore and actively promotes other authors and their work.

In his mind, the more people who read, the better, regardless of the book. I whole heartedly agree.

In the same way, charities are not in competition with other charities. They are in competition with people not giving. So, I don’t try to promote Opportunity International Australia at the cost of other charities, bad-mouthing them and discouraging people from giving to them. There have been times when I’ve notice that Opportunity is not a fit for a particular supporter – their passion does not align with the work that Opportunity does, and I have suggested other organisations they can give to. I also encourage people have a portfolio of organisations that they support through their giving so that their impact can be spread across a few different areas because we are more than just ‘single-issue’ people.

In my mind, the more people who give to charity, the better, regardless of the organisation. I hope you whole heartedly agree.

With, or without, her spoon, she is right

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My favourite part about watching my son run around the track at his athletics club is that it’s not important who crosses the finish line first. The focus is on getting the best out of yourself and going for a Personal Best (PB) time. I love seeing him run faster, throw, and jump further than he has ever run before. He is excited by that as well as he discovers that he is capable of so much more than he thought possible.

Sometimes he wins, sometimes he doesn’t, but it doesn’t matter, he is only competing against himself. The strength of that attitude is that it leaves space for more than one person to win in any race. It is not a zero-sum game, but it’s a place of growth, a place of development, a place of abundance.

We might think that type of attitude has no place outside of kids’ athletics, but it is truly how we can live our whole lives.

In a world where we live with the philosophy of “survival of the fittest” (which is a sham by the way), we are taking the easy way out. It’s easy when all you have to do is try and just be a little bit better than the other team, the other person, the other organisation, we do improve but only incrementally.

If we shifted our focus from trying to be a little bit better than someone else, and begin to imagine what we are capable of, then we realise that we can always get better compared to what we have done before and we are capable of so much more than we think is possible.

Mostly, just because someone else is doing well, it doesn’t mean that we lose out. There isn’t a limited amount of success in the world, there is an abundance meaning we can celebrate when other people are doing well and strive to get our own PB.

As Reese Witherspoon said, “Someone else’s success isn’t impeding mine”.

I Didn’t Win Again?

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There’s the old story of a man sitting in front of the tv watching the lotto numbers be read out and exclaiming, ‘Dammit, I didn’t win again!’

The response then comes from his partner, ‘I keep telling you Albert, you have to buy a ticket first!’

The arrogance of someone expecting to win something that they haven’t even entered is funny for the onlooker and sad for those involved.

But at some level we all do that. We can all expect an outcome without putting in the work beforehand. Expecting to get a promotion without putting in the hard work previously. Expecting to lose weight without eating well and exercising. Expecting to win an event without training. Expecting that the world will come calling without spending the time creating and preparing. Expecting to win the respect of others without first showing respect to people.

First, we do the work, then the outcomes happen. Not all outcomes are guaranteed though, but if the work is done first then the likelihood of an expected outcome is much higher.

One outcome that is guaranteed is the outcome of generosity. Once you are generous you feel good, you help the world be a better place and create good things all around you. You don’t even need to buy a ticket, just give some money away.

Generous Robot

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I jumped on the bandwagon and asked ChatGPT to write a short article on generosity for me. This is what it came up with…(I’ve made some notes along the way).

“Generosity is the act of giving freely and without expecting anything in return. (Solid start…)

It is a quality that has been admired and celebrated throughout human history, and is considered a virtue in many cultures and religions. (A little broad and sweeping but a fair comment).

Being generous can take many forms, from giving money or goods to those in need, to volunteering time and expertise to help others. (Very nice. Much of what I have written is about these elements of generosity).

It can also be as simple as being kind and attentive to those around us, or offering a listening ear to someone who needs it. (Yep. Accurate).

One of the benefits of being generous is that it can bring joy and satisfaction to both the giver and the receiver. (Yes, that’s exactly what I have said before).

Giving to others can make us feel good about ourselves and can create a sense of purpose and fulfillment. It also helps to build stronger communities, as acts of generosity can foster trust and connection between people. (This is scarily on point, the communities thing was a nice touch too).

In today’s fast-paced and often-self-centered world, generosity can be a powerful force for good. It reminds us that we are all interconnected and that our actions can have a positive impact on the lives of others. (Okay, now we are delving into a poignant comment on our current cultural challenges. Preach it robot!).

Generosity is not only about giving material things, but also about giving our time, energy, and attention to others. It’s about being present and fully engaged with the people around us, and about being willing to put the needs of others before our own. (Nice little wrap up, a little bit primary schoolish for me)

So, let’s strive to be more generous in our daily lives. Small acts of kindness can make a big difference in the world, and can bring a sense of joy and purpose to our own lives. (Lands it with a call to action! Am I out of a job?).”

I tell you, if a robot gets it, surely we can all embrace a little more generosity in our lives.

2023 Theme – With Intent

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Usually ‘with intent’ has a negative connotation. For example, ‘with intent to distribute’…(or any of the below…)

It means that there is a purpose behind specific actions that someone takes, and that individual is aware that their actions will most likely cause a certain outcome, making them responsible for that outcome.

What it brings to mind for me is how my 6-year-old son behaves in a way that shows intent to annoy his 3 year old sister. I will often share my disappointment when he upsets her on purpose just to get her to react.

But it works both ways, because intent can be positive, and that is my hope for 2023. To be intentional with my actions – the more specific the better, in areas where my life isn’t going how I would like.

What makes intent positive or negative are the words that come after ‘with intent’. ‘With intent’, to what?  

So, my theme for 2023 is to live ‘with intent’. Intent to:

  • Be generous with specific amounts, organisations and people
  • Learn specific things
  • Improve specific parts of my finances
  • Spend time doing specific things which strengthen my body and mind
  • Spend time with specific people (and to find some more of these specific people)

(I do have these specific things, organisations and people articulated, in case you were wondering. This is just an overview.)

2023 is going to be my year of intent, to live knowing that my actions will most likely cause a certain outcome and that I am responsible for that outcome.

Where could you use some positive intent?

What I missed out on from not being on Facebook in 2022…

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On December 31 2021, I deactivated my Facebook account. I was struck by the fact that it wasn’t adding anything of value to my life. So I decided to quit it. Here’s what I missed out on from not being on Facebook this year…

  • Not as many people contacted me on my birthday. (I probably missed your birthday too. Sorry about that).
  • 20% less people viewed my blog.

That’s it.

What I gained:

  • More time being present with family (still not great at that).
  • More headspace to think creatively.
  • A sense of moral superiority when I hear people talking about Facebook. (Not proud of that one).
  • More time to work.
  • A greater sense of peace and less angst.
  • Zero pointless notifications.
  • Less craziness and outrage.
  • Zero conspiracy theories.

That’s a win.

Now, what to do with Instagram?

How to give Christmas presents when you suck at giving Christmas presents

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity Guy4 Comments

When you don’t have any idea what to give someone at Christmas it is terrifying, and when that person is your significant other and your relationship depends on how well you perform, then it is life or death.

Many of these are actual mistakes I have made in the past. As the Generosity Guy, it is my job to help you learn from my mistakes. I’m still not great, but I am getting better.

Here are some do’s and don’ts:

Don’t

  • Don’t give cash, unless they want cash and say, “I only want cash”. Even then it could be a trap, so at least wrap the cash up in a pretty bow.
  • Don’t spend all the money you have on their present. Christmas is important but so is paying rent the week after Christmas
  • Don’t go into debt to pay for an outrageous gift. See the previous point about paying future rent.
  • Don’t buy them a gym membership. Even if they say, “I would really like a gym membership”, this is also a trap and will come back to bite you.
  • Don’t buy a dolphin picture. They are never received as well as you would think and just create tension.
  • Don’t buy just one thing. If you are super uncertain about what to get someone, just buying one thing is a pretty big risk. Hedge your bets, buy a few smaller items which gives you more of a chance of getting something right. You can always return the things they don’t like and give them the cash from that (in a pretty bow).
  • Don’t write them a song, unless you are a professional song writer. Even then I’m not sure how well it would go down. Most of the good ones have been written already anyway. Probably don’t sing them a song that someone else has written, that lacks originality.
  • Don’t ask your ex what to give your current partner. That’s just messed up.
  • Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Remember, it’s the thought that counts and the fact that you are trying your best is a great start.

Do

  • Do ask the person you are buying for to give some ideas or suggestions. If you need to be subtle about finding out, ask “for a friend”, that always works (about 60% of the time).
  • Do get clarity about gift expectations. There’s nothing like the anxiety on Christmas morning when you realise that the agreement not to buy each other a present was one that you made up in your head.
  • Do ask their family members what they think (but beware of the family member who doesn’t like you and pretends to help but is secretly throwing you under the bus by suggesting that you buy them something that will bring back traumatic memories of a childhood experience, promptly ending your relationship).
  • Do try and think of things that you have done together over the last year that they seemed to enjoy. Things like events you went to (sporting, or music, or other things that people do) and buy tickets to that again. You will soon find out whether they really enjoyed it when you went together or whether they were just pretending to make you feel better. Either way you get to go again so win-win.
  • Do take them to their favourite store for a shopping spree to a set amount. Sure, it’s the same as cash or a gift voucher but it feels a bit more personal when you take them.
  • Do buy them a book. People should read more.
  • Do buy them music. People should listen to more music.
  • Do buy them an Opportunity International Australia Gift of Opportunity – that is guaranteed to make them feel good, because, really, who needs more stuff?

Any other tips are warmly welcomed.

Lack of Purpose is a First World Problem

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50 years ago there was no such thing as finding your purpose. You found a job, you worked at that job and you provided for your family. If you were lucky enough you would stay at the company your entire career until you retired.

Now, every second person is having an existential crisis, asking themselves the question, ‘Is this what I really want to be doing?’ (I’m allowed to say this, I have been one of these people.)  

Lack of purpose is a first world problem. How lucky we are to have this issue. For millions, maybe billions, of people today, they don’t get to have that thought because their main priority is survival.

Still, I wish we could all have that existential crisis because it would allow us all to truly find something in life that truly connects us with our purpose. Although we are thinking about it all wrong. The questions I hear people asking are, ‘What do I want to do?’, or ‘What can I achieve?’, or ‘How do I find my particular thing?’.

What we really should be asking is ‘How can I help other people?’, or ‘Where can I serve today?’, or ‘What can I do that will bring the most value to others?’.

That will help you find your purpose, because your purpose is about other people.

Or, as Pablo Picasso puts it,

“The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.”