Tag: Mental Health

KFC for the Soul

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

KFC can be nice on occasion. KFC chips are a specialty in our household. Not everyday mind you, not even every week. It’s probably been a few months since we last stopped past and picked some up. It was a nice treat.

That aside, KFC is bad for you. If you were to eat it every day, for every meal it would destroy your body and general health, as well as your negatively impact your mental health.

In the same way, Johann Hari notes that “materialism is like KFC for the soul”. It’s nice once in a while, but if you live in it all day everyday it will destroy your body and general health, as well as negatively impact your mental health.

Materialism is devastating because of the continuous infiltration of messaging in our lives that tells us that to feel better, to look better, to find more love, to overcome our sadness and depression and anxiety we just need to buy more, to upgrade, to get another one, to get a newer one, to have more than one. By doing that we will find happiness, purpose, and everything we have ever dreamed of. Except we don’t.

The crazy thing about this is that we know it. We know that buying stuff doesn’t solve anything long term. We get a nice feeling in the moment but it doesn’t last long enough to get the newly purchased item home before the sadness starts to sneak back in.

One of the methods to help overcome our emotional challenges is to focus less on the self and more of ‘we’. Giving to other people, through time, money and expertise, can help overcome the isolation that depression and anxiety can bring. Generosity is the superfood for the soul. It is so good for us it is almost beyond belief, but it’s real. You can’t have too much of it either, that’s how good it is for you.

“Put on your own mask first” is flawed

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

“You must put on your own mask first before assisting others.”

This makes sense in an emergency flight situation, because if you try to help someone put on their oxygen mask before you have yours on, it is likely you will pass out very quickly before you can finish helping them, leading to a dire situation for you, and them.

We have imported this pre-flight safety element into a life philosophy. It gets used when talking about our mental health. Another one is ‘you can’t give from an empty cup’. Basically, look after yourself before you try to look after others.

It seems to fit, but it’s wrong.

These ideas assume that your mental health is not connected to the people around you, and if you are struggling with areas of life, all you need to do is to take a break from the world or isolate yourself from everyone else, recharge, feel better and then come back into the world to care for people.

There may be times when that is necessary, but the wellbeing of an individual is deeply linked to being in contact with and even caring for other people.

If you can spend time helping someone else and you can see the difference you are making, it will energise you. It is not a case of putting on your own mask first or filling your own cup up and then giving of yourself, but as you help someone else “put their mask on”, or “fill their cup”, your mask will be put on and cup will be filled up. As you care for others you will care for yourself. (Unless you don’t have generous boundaries).

Generosity is Good for Your Mental Health

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

It is something that studies have revealed frequently over the last decade, generosity is good for you. It feels good and it improves happiness.

It also turns out that the specific type of generous act can have an impact as well. A study was done to see what happens to the brain when people act generously. People were given the opportunity to give money to someone that they knew (someone they had been introduced to in the study) who needed it, a charity or to themselves. Now it is no surprise that when the study participants chose to give money to someone they knew who needed it, or to a charity, they felt good – better than when they gave it to themselves. The areas of the brain that ‘lit up’ where those that are linked to the reward system, providing a feeling of satisfaction and happiness. This is a common finding in a number of studies.

What was surprising is that when the participants chose to give money to someone that they knew, this action, which is called targeted support, was associated with diminished activity in the amygdala. The amygdala gets a great deal of attention nowadays because it is the section of the brain which is connected to emotions, the fight or flight response, anxiety, phobias and post traumatic stress disorder. This diminished activity leads to less anxiety and other mental health issues. Generosity is good for your mental health.

But it must be heartfelt rather than begrudgingly done. To get the true benefits of generosity for your mental health it is best to be generous on purpose. Be intentional with who and what you are giving to.