“Well done everyone…mostly me”
It has become a standard saying that I share with my kids at the end of a car trip. It started out as a show of appreciation for how well they behaved in the car on the way home from wherever we were, but something within me wanted to make sure that they knew I did most of the work by driving. It’s a joke…mostly, with a bit of ego.
The same instinct shows up in other areas of life that are supposed to be about someone else entirely. There can be some giant egos attempting to hide inside generous acts. The kind of ego that needs the name on everything they give to, that talks about it constantly to anyone within earshot, that compares their acts against others, not for the benefit of encouraging others to generous acts, but to boost their own profile.
The paradox is that good things can and will come from that sort of generosity. People will be helped, communities will grow and obstacles will be overcome. But probably not as much as they would if the ego was a little less.
But how do you know if there is a giant ego hiding behind your generous acts?
Simply put, if you are trying to prove to someone that you are generous (even if it is only you that you are trying to prove it to), then your ego is very active.
I am always happy to call out great acts of generosity; I think people should have names on buildings if they have given significantly to help create them. But it is not a competition.
Generosity doesn’t need the recognition, but also doesn’t need to be completely anonymous. It has the strength of character to handle both.
“Well done everyone”. (minus the “mostly me”).
The Generosity Guy 