Tag: Strength

The Generosity of Confidence

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“Confidence is your ability to see yourself as flawed, as imperfect, but still hold yourself in high regard.” – Esther Perel, quoting a friend.

For some, confidence is all about bravado. About ‘faking it til you make it’. About focusing only on the good things and covering over anything that is bad so that no one sees it, and so it doesn’t exist. It is strength. It is power. It is arrogance.

They also would consider humility a weakness, and something to be avoided at all costs because you ‘cannot be strong and humble’.

I strongly disagree.

There is a strength that comes with being self-aware enough to know that you are flawed, and you are imperfect, but at the same time you can be confident in who you are and what you bring.

Failing to recognise your flaws and imperfections is not strength, or confidence. That is weakness. Everyone else can see it. Even if you think you are excellent at hiding it, it seeps out. Everyone knows you are flawed and imperfect. Don’t kid yourself, because you would be the only person you are kidding.

This humble strength is innately generous. It gives you space to recognise that you aren’t what you want to be yet, but even so, who you are right now is awesome. You can be confident in that.

Power Over Others is Weakness

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“Power over others is weakness disguised as strength.” Eckart Tolle

It’s obvious when it happens to other people. I can see it as clear as day, and I can’t figure out why they can’t.

A negative comment, a harsh opinion, and quite frankly, offensive words, from someone that is unknown to the individual. Someone that hasn’t earned the right to have any opinion that carries weight, but still it upsets. In that moment they are allowing this anonymous person to have power over them, and that anonymous person is stepping into that position of power by taking on a role of ‘expert’.

The truth is this: anything that is said or done, especially from someone whom you do not know, has nothing to do with you or your behaviour, and is all about the other person and their issues. Their pain and insecurity is overflowing and manifesting as judgement and outrage.

It is easy to see when it is happening to others, but when it happens to you, when someone judges you for something you say or do or write, it is a lot more challenging to not be swayed by ‘public opinion’. It can be difficult to not give someone power over how we feel.

It is even harder to spot when you are the perpetrator of that ‘public opinion’. When you are tearing someone down because of their ‘awful’ behaviour sometimes it is almost impossible to see that your pain and insecurity is overflowing on to others. That feeling of power and influence is intoxicating.

Power is an illusion. We seek it and wield it because it can help us feel strong, but ‘power over others is weakness disguised as strength’.

True strength comes from humility. It comes from generosity. It comes from lifting others up. It takes great strength to not be swayed by ‘public opinion’ and secure in your own identity.

If you are in a position of power, or a seeking a position of power, perhaps take a moment and discover what area of weakness you are trying to cover up.

I’ll Give More

Published on by Kieran Johnson - The Generosity GuyLeave a comment

I’ve seen my fair share of generous acts. The one’s that stand out most are those that are initiated out of trying circumstances. There is something special about witnessing an act of strength out of a place of weakness. That’s what I would consider a generous act to be – one of strength.

I spoke to a supporter recently, just to check in and see how he was going in the current climate, hoping that he and his family were safe and healthy, which they were.

During the conversation, his concern turned to the people that Opportunity works with. Those living in poverty in India and Indonesia and how this global pandemic is affecting them, and what it could look like in the next few months. The truth is, we really haven’t seen anything close to what the impact the Coronavirus will have on developing countries, and these two specifically. My sense is that it will get a great deal worse before we see any light at the end of the tunnel which will have drastic implications on millions of people.

This supporter shared my concerns and agreed with this dire possibility. He said, ‘I like what Opportunity does and how you go about it. I will give again this year, and I will give more than I have before’.

I was blown away. We are still living with a great deal of uncertainty in Australia. No one really knows when things will turn around economically for us, but here was someone who was committing to an act of strength when surrounded by weakness. This type of generosity is so powerful that it impacts everyone it touches. I was inspired, and I know that what he will give will also inspire those living in poverty who will be on the receiving end.